Thirty Minute Pony Stories

“Rainbow, I think you’re taking what I said a little bit too literally. I didn’t actually mean that books were weapons, I was saying-”

Twilight Sparkle’s words fell upon deaf ears. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie had each picked up a fairly substantial load of books between the two of them, now believing themselves to be the deadliest warriors in all of Equestria. The two of them charged off in search of any takers foolish enough to try and defeat them.

Twilight sighed, leaning against the open door frame in defeat. Sometimes she really didn’t get why those two did what they did. At times they just seemed to do things for the sake of doing them, without any rhyme or reason to it. Especially Pinkie Pie, heavens above. Still, there was something strangely compelling about it. Maybe Twilight was simply being close-minded, and there really was a method to their respective madnesses. Her exploration into the mechanics of Pinkie Sense certainly served to support that hypothesis. It was strangely compelling. Perhaps even enthralling, to a small degree. Especially recently, as she had begun observing their behaviour more closely, and noticing it to be even stranger than usual. It warranted a more intimate investigation. Twilight grabbed her notepad and began to head out the door before being stopped by Spike.

“Where are you going?” he asked, curious that Twilight would leave all of a sudden. “You’re not going to follow Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash, are you?”

“I have to, Spike.” Twilight replied. “The scientific method cannot be ignored, and I’ve gotta get to the bottom of this once and for all!”

Spike sighed. For being as studious as she was, Twilight was surprisingly resistant to learning simple, common-sense notions like “leave well enough alone”, “let sleeping fish lie”, and “trying to understand anything Pinkie does ever is a ludicrously bad idea”. Oh well, he supposed, they’ll come to her eventually.

Twilight snuck through the bushes, looking for some kind of sign. Rainbow and Pinkie usually weren’t this hard to find, especially when they were together. Typically they’d be off pulling some crazy prank on somepony or getting into some other kind of wacky antics or something, it’d be strange that they suddenly just disappear like that.

Stranger still was the discovery of the two’s book arsenal outside of Sugarcube Corner. Perhaps the two of them had stopped there for a bite to eat, Twilight told herself. Going inside, she began her investigation.

Nothing. This was getting stranger by the minute. Mrs. Cake was in the bakery, though, and said that the two of them had gone upstairs not too long ago. Twilight sighed. This chase was beginning to get ridiculous. All Twilight wanted to do was make a few observations of their behaviour together. And perhaps ask them to come with her to see if there were any particular reason the two of them acted even more off-the-wall then usual when they were with each other. Was that too much to ask?

Maybe I’m overthinking this, Twilight began to think. Maybe all it is is that they just enjoy each other’s company that much? No. Pranks as obtuse as theirs were didn’t just happen out of thin air, there had to be a reason. 

Being an observer, Twilight wasn’t about to take the direct approach just yet. Going back outside, she used her magic to lift herself up to the second level of Sugarcube Corner, looking around for an open window and any sign of Dash and Pinkie.

Seconds later, she found them. Oh, did she ever find them. She found them so much that she cried aloud in shock, losing her concentration and plummeting to the ground. The pair of ponies didn’t notice, thankfully, though who would blame them when they were so, er, preoccupied.

Twilight began to stand up, slightly dazed, and still somewhat shocked by her findings. Needless to say, she wouldn’t be recording this observation, for fear of Spike discovering it at the library. Still, it was quite the interesting find, if a bit shocking. Though something occurred to Twilight as she mulled over exactly what she had seen, and she had to laugh in spite of herself.

Perhaps, in hindsight, titling her notes “An Intimate Exploration of the Mannerisms of Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash” was more appropriate than she had previously thought.

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Prompter’s Comments

Oh, poor, silly Twilight. This is why you should leave things be. A very funny story! Twilight was very IC. It’s just like her to pull things like this and be so oblivious till the end. The final line had me busting a gut too. Nice work!