Thirty Minute Pony Stories

She remembered being one of the many ponies standing in the chapel waiting for Princess Cadence and Shining Armor to be wed. But Lyra wasn’t one of the bridesmaids, as she bragged. They were ponies from Ponyville, but not Lyra and her friends.

They were that pony’s friends. Twilight Sparkle’s friends. They were the Elements of Harmony, so something unpleasant was bound to happen. Whenever those Elements are together, everything would break down before them. But there was one missing. If all six weren’t together, then nothing bad would happen.

Then she had to burst in. Another Princess Cadence and Twilight Sparkle. Whenever Twilight Sparkle peaked her head in another pony’s problem, Bon Bon knew something bad would happen. After all, she was the one who caused all the ponies in Ponyville to fight over a meager stuffed animal.

Knowing something catastrophic would happen, Bon Bon ran from the chapel. She would have to find Lyra and go far, far away from Twilight Sparkle and her band of “friends” before-

Crash.

The barrier surrounding Canterlot shattered.

Then they came from the skies.

The entirety of Canterlot was in chaos. The twisted aberrations with an uncanny resemblance to jet-black ponies with strange wings and cloudy eyes were attacking the citizens. One by one, the ponies were whisked away from their hooves and into the air. The ponies that tried to fight back found themselves overwhelmed by the creatures’ strength.

Bon Bon couldn’t bring herself to care.

She was used to this chaos. Her hometown of Ponyville was regularly assaulted by bizarre creatures, nearly demolished by malevolent beings of legend, frequently uprooted by the very ponies that lived in Ponyville.

It was just what Equestria needed, anyway.

“Bon Bon? Bon Bon!” She heard as the pony ran through the town.

Bon Bon stopped. She frantically turned her head towards the sound of the voice. Through an alley, she saw Lyra run towards her. Lyra slowed her pace periodically to clench her forehead.

“Are you alright?” Bon Bon asked, “and why weren’t you in the chapel?”

“I-I just had the weirdest dream. One moment I was talking to Princess Cadence, and then I’m suddenly in some old cave with achy muscles. The barrier’s broken and there’re these pegasus, uh, unicorn -whatever they are- flying around.  Did I miss something fun at the afterparty?”

“No.” Bon Bon said flatly. “In fact, we should-“

A strong gale cut her off. Dust and trash flew into the air. A pillar of a pale pink light shot from the chapel. It burst into a gigantic sphere and expanded outwards, like some sort of wave from the ocean. It swept up the strange bug-eyed, bug-winged creatures in its massive current as brushed them away like a piece of driftwood. A tempest of light rushed passed Lyra and Bon Bon, yet they were struck with a rather brisk wind.

———[Time limit]———

The storm stopped.

Bon Bon gaped at the streets filled with cheering ponies. They were saved. It was just like in Ponyville. Even though Twilight Sparkle and her friends caused the troubles that ailed Ponyville, they were always the ones that solved the problems. With those ponies, everything was unpredictable and often chaotic. But with those ponies, everything would surely return to normal.

“Did they already say ‘I do?!’ No fair!” Lyra indignantly shouted at the chapel’s tallest spire. “You can’t say ‘I do’ without out your bridesmaids!”

Commentary from Donny’s Boy

I really enjoyed your characterization of Bon Bon throughout this, how she’s mostly irritated and contemptuous of the Mane Six. It brings a really different and unique perspective to the show’s protagonists. It was nice, too, that Bon Bon’s irritability was softened a bit by the end with “[b]ut with those ponies, everything would surely return to normal.” Plus, Lyra’s utter lack of perspective in her final lines was pretty funny.