Thirty Minute Pony Stories

It was always the same. Circulation, never ceasing. No matter how the world changed around those with shorter lifespans, it was a repeating pattern to immortals. Fashion, trends, ideas. No matter how original they thought they were, history always repeated itself. However, over the course of the centuries, there were those few ponies who stood out, who were truly original. They broke the limits on what was expected, on what was normal.

Twilight Sparkle was one such pony. With an IQ above genius level, she had set records, created spells, and was, by Celestia’s observations, the most powerful mortal since the very first unicorns. She had alicorn-level potential, and it needed to be cultivated carefully. Magic that powerful wasn’t to be toyed with. If it went unchecked, her potential would outgrow her body’s ability to handle it. She’d burn out in a blaze of light like a miniature sun, taking out whoever was in a several mile-wide radius.

However, Celestia had not discussed this with her beloved student, for fear of upsetting her. She was volatile as it was, and she didn’t need any rampant emotions. There was also the matter of the remedy to the situation. If Twilight was to physically keep up with her mental and magical capacities, she’d have to give up her mortality. That was not a light subject matter in itself, but coupled with the matter of her inevitable burn out, it was a doozy.

As it turned out, Twilight once again blew her expectations out of the water. Not only was she completely unfazed by the revelation, she’d been running the numbers and watching her power growth carefully, having predicted it early on. She hadn’t figured out how to stop it, though.

“You have to become an alicorn.”

“Huh?”

“In order to prevent a burn out, your body has to be capable of containing your immense power. If you remain mortal, you’ll kill hundreds, maybe thousands of innocent ponies.”

“But what about me? Everyone I love whither away and die while I never age!”

“So you don’t love me, Luna, Cadence, or your brother? He’s immortal, now, you know.”

“Of course I love you guys, it’s ju- wait, my brother is immortal?”

“Of course. When a mortal becomes the mate of any immortal, they live forever. As soon as they consummated their marriage, he stopped aging.”

“While I haven’t quite wrapped my head around that, WAY too much information. Just because I know they do it doesn’t mean I have to to know they ‘do’ it.”

“What, do you not like the mental image of your brother and foal sitter rutting like dogs in heat?”

“GAAAHH! Seriously? When did you get so pervy?” A blush spread across Twilight’s face, hotter than the sun.

“The moment you grew up. In all seriousness, I don’t want you to grow up anymore. I suppose there are other ways to control your power, but the truth is, I’m a bit too selfish to let you go.”

“Really? Well, how am I going to become an alicorn then?”

“By consensually becoming an alicorn’s mate.”

“I thought we were past the joking.”

“Oh, that part was completely serious. You must mate with an alicorn to become immortal, then Luna, Cadence, and I will share a portion of our power with you, and ‘poof!’, alicorn.”

“Poof?”

“Poof. Magic. Unseen forces. The power of love. Whatever you want to call it, it happens. Very rarely, but it does. Once I give you immortality, you’re free to do whatever you want, with no more fear of a burn out.”

“Y-you give me immortality?”

“Would you rather it be Luna?”

“Oh uh, no, I just didn’t realize, umm, the implications.”

“What, the physical part? Mmm, yes, sounds quite nice, actually.”

“What?!?”

“Oh, you don’t find me attractive?”

“O-oh, n-n-no, I umm… what?”

Celestia chuckled. It was going to be quite a fun eternity, watching the next generation of ponies grow and change, following that same old pattern. The monotonous circle, going on and on. And the next generation after that. And the next generation after that. It was always the same, after all.

Krizak Comments!

Though this story seems to return to the premise from the beginning a bit too abruptly at the end, it was quite amusing until that point. Celestia making Twilight squirm a little bit was fun, and Twilight’s growing shock kept me giggling.