Thirty Minute Pony Stories

“All right. Does everyone remember the plan?”

“Ugh! Yes, Twilight. You’ve only made us go over it twenty times.”

“That’s a total exaggeration. It was only five times, at most.”

“Dashie’s right, Twi! We’ve gone over what everypony’s supposed to do so much that we’re super duper ready!”

“I just don’t want any incidents like … last time.”

“Oh. Um. I … I’m sorry …”

“Now, now, darling, you’ve already apologized for that, and that’s more than sufficient. Isn’t it, Twilight?”

“Rarity, we’re not in Equestria anymore. We have to be more careful. Don’t you remember how long it took Applejack’s leg to heal a few months ago? We don’t have any hospitals! No doctors, no nurses, no medics, no—“

“All right, Twi, we get it! Geez! We know the plan, and things’ll go off without a hitch. It’s just a tiny cargo ship. A bunch of totally awesome pirates like us can totally take ‘em!”

“Hey, now! We ain’t pirates! My granny raised me to be a right ‘n proper farmer, not some sorta lowlife.”

“Applejack, honestly. One must face reality and adjust to one’s present circumstances …”

“Besides, we’re not really pirates. Per se. We’re more … emergency supply redistribution associates …”

“Um, Twilight. That doesn’t really … that’s kinda not …”

“Oh, cheer up, girls! It’s not like we hurt anypony and, besides, we always share everything we get with ponies who don’t have enough food to eat or medicine to take. And sharing is caring!”

“You’re not gonna sing the song again … are you?”

“Girls! Focus! Now, are we sure that each of us remembers our role?”

“Ugh. Okay, fine. I’m in charge of flyin’ our ship in close without getting spotted. Because I’m just an awesome flier in space as I was back in Ponyville.”

“I’m the distraction! Whoo hoo!”

“I shall be casting the incapacitation spell, as per usual. It’s old hat by now.”

“I’ll be monitoring all the ponies once they’re, um, asleep. To make sure they’re okay. Oh! And to make sure they stay asleep until we’re off the ship.”

“I’m the muscle, o’ course. Need a pony with strong legs and back to move all o’ them heavy crates.”

“That’s .. that’s actually exactly correct. I have to admit, girls, that I’m impressed.”

“We’ve been tellin’ you, Twi! We know the deal. We got this.”

“All right, then. Cargo ship’s just come onto radar, and grappling beam is on stand-by. Let’s go pirating!”

“Whoo hoo!”

“Aww, yeah!”

“Tally-ho!”

“Yee-haw!”

“ … I … I thought you said we weren’t pirates?”

Krizak Comments!

You know, I had considered changing today’s prompt to reflect a certain holiday, but then I remembered that somepony had already run a pirate prompt in the past. >_> Anyway, this barely qualifies for the prompt, but I guess ponies in space is good enough, which is good, because this is hilarious. I like the argument as to whether or not they’re pirates, and the Mane Six’s banter in general.