Thirty Minute Pony Stories

“Hurry!”

“I’m hurrying!”

Twilight panted as she ran up the steps of the royal palace.

Her pursuant was faster than her. A lot faster. Twilight had managed to conjure a spell of Fleet Feet, but it wasn’t enough.

So she had no choice but to obey her partner-in-crime. Madmare or no.

She followed the bouncing pink mare up the stairs, around a corner, and into…

Oh, no.

Celestia’s royal bedchambers.

Twilight grimaced.

Well…I guess she won’t get the chance to banish or imprison me if I’m dead…

Still not quite certain, but finding self-preservation to be a very driving force, Twilight entered and slammed the door shut behind her. Her horn glowed, and the lock clicked.

A mere moment later…

BANG

…something slammed into the door. Hard.

The door shuddered, but held.

Twilight turned back to Pinkie Pie as she struggled to catch her breath. “Well…that…was…”

Pinkie bounced, seeming in perfect health. She giggled. “Twilight, why’re you so tired? We only ran for—”

“Look…haven’t been…getting exercise since—”

BANG

Dropping the matter, Twilight quickly turned and appraised the door’s condition.

Celestia had enchanted it with all the wards she knew, clearly. Runes were carved all over the bronze threshold. Whenever anything tested its endurance, it would glow bright as the sun.

It was getting hard to look at, frankly. Doesn’t seem very practica—

BANG

It was straining.

“She’s very strong.”

“Well, duh!” Pinkie rolled her eyes. “And she’s mad!” She leaned over, jabbing Twilight in the chest. “That was a bad idea, Sparky!”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Well, it’s not my fault. You’re the one who wanted to test the spell out.”

“Yep!” Pinkie grinned, jabbing Twilight again. “And you’re the silly filly who got Applejack to let us use her hat!”

BANG

Twilight shrugged, looking away. “If it had worked, Applejack would have a fireproof hat right now.”

“As opposed to the thingy burning down Canterlot right now?” Pinkie’s grin widened.

BANG

Twilight winced. “Uh, maybe we should…”

She looked around.

The room was surprisingly barren. There was the bed, a dresser…

She tried her magic. No good. Either the two pieces of furniture were warded, or they were just nailed to the floor.

“We need something to brace the door with,” Twilight said. She raised an eyebrow and considered the puzzle.

Perhaps a—

“Ooh!” Pinkie bounced into a closet, out of sight. “What’s in here?”

“Pinkie, don’t—”

“Hey, check it out!” Pinkie came back into view, apparently dragging something. From the sounds of it, it was very heavy. “I found something!”

“What are you…”

Twilight trailed off.

“…why is that in Celestia’s closet? Why would she think it’s a good idea to keep it in her—”

“Well, it’s better than that garden!” Pinkie grabbed onto the item in her mouth, for better leverage, and kept dragging it.

Twilight stared. Then, sighing, her horn glowed, and she lifted the item into air.

BANG

She placed Discord’s statue against the door.

BANG

“Think that’ll hold?” Pinkie asked.

BANG

A crack appeared in Discord’s otherwise immaculate stone form.

I’ll be lucky if I just get imprisoned…

BANG

The statue fell over and broke. The head bounced, rolled, and came to rest at Twilight’s hooves.

And/or banished…

Krizak Comments!

Oh, Twilight Sparkle, what did you do this time? All we have to go by is a stolen hat and the city of Canterlot burning, so I choose to believe that it gained both sentience and pyrokinetic powers from Twilight’s spell. As for poor Discord, you would think his petrified form would make a better doorstop, but alas! I wonder if that’ll affect him; he seemed to be capable of taking off his head when he was in power, but as a statue… Anyway, this was pure madcap zaniness from start to finish, and enjoyable throughout.